At Olive Garden

As cheesy as it sounds, we end up going to the Olive Garden a lot.
The waitress wants to know if we'd like to try a sample glass of their new wine. Mom says no, but then thinks better of it and then says "YES!" as soon as she hears it's a red wine, which is her lifeblood. Mom savors the free glass of mooched wine without even a second thought of ordering and paying for a legitimate glass. This wine isn't exactly up to her red wine standards, but that doesn't prevent her from emptying the glass.
No matter how many times we go, my mom almost always gets the same thing, even though it takes her nine million years to decide and she wants to be the last person to order. Her standard Olive Garden order is the Eggplant Parmigiana, BUT my mom also wants 2 (she always holds up her fingers to make sure our waiter or waitress gets this important request) additional meatballs to go with her spaghetti. What makes this order funny is that mom starts off telling them that she doesn't want any of the cheese or her meal, as if she's going the healthy route (because fried eggplant is totally healthy anyway), but then drops the meatball bomb that she essentially wants two dinners (she doesn't eat the whole thing, only half and takes the leftovers home). The waitress reminds her that she will have to pay extra for the meatballs, which my mom is ok with, but she didn't used to when she would just order one extra meatball and I guess it was on the house. I guess Olive Garden wised up to her and her freebee wine and additional meatball wanting ways.
Also, when my mom orders her salad it is very important for her to get caesar salad dressing on the side (the fact that Olive Garden does not up front offer a selection of dressings is offensive to her and if she's feeling like it she will tell them so) and a plate of butter to go with her breadsticks.
When the check comes, mom tries to bogart all the andes candies mints!